Friday, August 31, 2007

Love That Late News

You gotta love the news that comes out late Friday or early Saturday on Labor Day weekend. Always something interesting. Usually something being swept under the rug.

How about Citigroup (C) quietly absorbing ACC Capital Holdings, one of the largest sub-prime lenders over the past few years, on Friday. How are we ever going to find out what really went on in that place? How is anyone going to be held accountable for making these loans to unqualified recipients? The old owner of the company is US ambassador to the Netherlands, so you know he's got some Carlyle connections. Poof! It's all gone, except the servicing agreements. Now all the fees these fools agreed to pay will accrue to C, which effectively put the company in business anyway. And the legal risk has disappeared. Arms-length my ass.

How about Bozo the President's performance on Friday? (Seinfeld says you never have to say Bozo the Clown, everyone knows what Bozo does. Not anymore, now that we have Bozo the President.) "If you've been cheating somebody, we're going to find you," he said to all the sub-prime mortgage brokers out there, "and hold you to account." Back at the sub-prime shops, they could barely hear Bozo talking over the sound of the shredding machines.

That press conference was a joke. He looked like a fish out of water, talking about real economics. Explaining how mortgages work, like he's an expert. Looking sternly into the camera to emphasize his points. The biggest laugh was saying he would make loans available to sub-prime buyers with good credit. You know who those people are? The speculators and the flippers. I actually thought for a moment that I saw the strings attached to his arms, head and legs, the ones his handlers use to play him like a marionette.